


Rest Now

by MaeveBran



Category: Outlander (TV)
Genre: Episode Related, F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-10-13
Updated: 2015-11-09
Packaged: 2018-04-26 05:01:16
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,116
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4991218
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MaeveBran/pseuds/MaeveBran
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A couple of missing scenes in episode 1.11, The Devil's Mark. Jamie and Claire reconect in the light of her revelations.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Set after Jamie rescues Claire from the witch trial and before he takes her to the standing stones.
> 
> The italics are quotes from the episode and as such belong to the brilliant Diana Galbaldon, Ronald D. Moore, and Toni Graphia.

I sat on the log pouring my story out to my husband, Jamie. He paced the glade listening. When I finally finished the story about how I had tried to go home once and been stopped by the British soldiers, he snapped and showed the first signs of really hearing my story.

 _“So, I left you in the glade and went to meet Horrocks,”_ he said. _“And you ran away.”_ He paused, still trying to make sense of it. _“You were trying to get back. Back to the stones. And back to your husband.”_ That last phrase came out as a whisper but I could still hear it.

 _“Yes,”_ I whispered back. I hated the pain I could hear in his voice. I knew he was feeling guilty over that and I was sorry for that, but a part of me, a very small part, was glad that he now knew why I hadn't apologized for running away.

 _“And I beat you for it,”_ he growled, his voice filled with self anger and guilt.

I felt, rather than saw him sit next to me. I was too emotionally raw to do much about his guilt, but his solid presence next to me was reassuring that we'd get through this. Get through to where, I had no idea, but I knew we'd get there together.

 _“I'm so very, very sorry,”_ he said.

 _“Don't,”_ I managed to croak out through the tears. They were tears of relief. I had told my story, to the most important person to me in this time and he believed me. Whatever else came, I could face it because he believed. _“You couldn't have known.”_ The tears came faster now and I tried to sniffle them away, not wanting to ad to his guilt but not able to stop the flow now that the dam had burst. 

Jamie moved closer and gathered me in his arms and pulled me to him making soothing noises and speaking Gaelic all the while. Like that first night at Castle Leoch, I found a refuge in his arms and felt safe enough to weep for my situation. Unlike that prior night, this time I was weeping for myself and all that had happened in the months since and not over missing my husband. I was still confused over which husband should have my loyalty but that was a problem for later.

 _“Rest now,”_ he smoothed a hand down my hair and onto my still bare back, careful to avoid the welts that marked it. _“No one will harm ye. I'm here.”_

After a moment, I was able to gather myself together enough to look him in the eye and ask the question I needed answering, _“Do you really believe me?”_

He looked into my eyes for a moment and tucked some errant strands of my hair behind my ears before he answered, with all the sincerity I needed. 

_“Aye.”_ he whispered. _“I believe you, Sassenach.”_

My heart leaped for joy. I could scarcely believe it. Jamie once again proved to be a remarkable man. He believed me, even without concrete proof.

 _“Although it would have been a good deal easier if ye had only been a witch,”_ he added with a wry smile.

I smiled faintly at that. Only he'd think being a witch was easier. We would have been quite the pair – the murdering outlaw and the witch.

He leaned down and kissed me tenderly. I needed that reassurance. He words had convinced me of his sincerity but the moment his lips touched mine, it was the final proof that he meant what he said. 

Once the kiss ended, I fell back into his arms with my head on his shoulder and wept a few minutes longer while he stroked my hair and whispered soothing words in Gaelic to me. I had finally found a safe harbor in the chaos that was my life. That safety seeped into me the longer I staid in his arms, until finally I noticed the breeze on my back and shivered. The emotions had given way and finally the physical discomfort came to the forefront of my consciousness.

“Ye cold, lass?” Jamie asked.

“Yes,” I answered.

He lifted me up and walked back to where Donas, his horse, had been tied. He was gone a minute but it felt ten times as long. He wrapped me in his plaid. The warmth of the wool and the enveloping comforting scent of him completed the comfort I needed.

“Can ye ride now?” he asked.

“Yes,” I answered. It would be a lot easier than riding after he had beaten me and I want to put more distance between us and the town that wanted to burn me as a witch.

A couple hours later, we had stopped in another small clearing in the woods near a steam. Jamie tied Donas up and took care of the horse. I made a fire before wiggling out of my torn gown and shift. Jamie came over to me and offered me the needle and thread he kept in his sporran for emergency repairs of his shirt. I sat and repaired my clothes as best as possible.

“Could you tell me your name, Sassenach?” Jamie asked. “Your real, whole name.”

“Claire Elizabeth Beauchamp Randall Fraser,” I answered. “Beauchamp was my maiden name. I used that because the Randall didn't seem wise when the first person in this time I ran into was Captain Randall.”

“No, I wouldn't imagine it would,” Jamie said. He had stiffened at the name Randall. “So, is, was, Frank a relation to Black Jack?”

“A direct descendant,” I answered. “It's how I knew about the Duke of Sandringham. Frank had been researching his family while we were here in the Highlands, tracing his ancestor's career.”

“Does he look anything like the Captain?” Jamie asked with curiosity.

“Almost exactly like,” I said. “It was hard for me, at first, to see Captain Randall behave so vilely whilst wearing the face of my husband.”

“Aye, I can see how that would be difficult,” he agreed, with some reluctance. “So the name and when you are from were what you were hiding.” 

“That was it,” I agreed. 

“Everything else?” he asked.

“The truth,” I said.

He stared into the fire for moment before reaching into the saddle bags he had brought over with him. He pulled out a couple cloth wrapped lumps and handed them to me. I unwrapped them and found a part of a wheel of cheese and a half a loaf of bread.

“I stopped at the Castle on the way to the kirk,” Jamie explained. “Mrs. Fitz was fretting at not being allowed to go bear witness for you. She knew what I was planning when I couldn't persuade my Uncle to stop the trial, so she handed me that. It was all she could spare without getting in trouble.”

“God bless Mrs. Fitz,” I said as I tore a piece of bread off the loaf.

“Amen,” Jamie agreed as he used his knife to cut some slices of cheese.

We ate in companionable silence as the sun sank below the horizon. We finished the bread and cheese and washed it down with the contents of Jamie's flask. As the night deepened, I snuggled closer to Jamie for warmth. I was, after all naked beneath the plaid.

“It's been a trying day,” Jamie said, as he got up to make a make shift bed by the fire. 

“That it has been,” I agreed. 

I stood and unwrapped the plaid from my body. I hated to loose it's warmth but it did figure greatly in the bedding. Jamie stopped his work and looked at me. I stood still, watching the desire light up his face. He stood and walked over to me and kissed me. This time, his kiss was not a kiss of gentle comfort but a deep and sensual one of need. He gathered me to him and deepened the kiss further. 

“I missed ye,” he murmured against my lips. 

“I missed you too,” I answered, as I twined my arms around his neck, trying to meld myself into him. His arms came around me, and, while that was where I wanted them, they brushed against and put pressure on my welts. I hissed at the pain.

“I'm sorry, Sassenach,” Jamie said as he pulled away. “I forgot ye were injured.”

“I forgot too,” I said as I stepped closer. “I want you.”

“I want ye too,” he said. “But I can wait, till you're healed.”

“But I can not,” I said as I started to undo the buttons on the fall of his pants. 

After the first two buttons had been slipped loose of their moorings, he brushed my hands away and finished the job himself. He kissed me again and lowered us both to the ground, keeping me on top. Soon we were racing, together, towards that place of fulfillment. The time apart and the emotionally fraught day only serving to heighten the pleasure. His cry mingled with mine as we scaled that peak together.

Afterward, the cold night air caused me to shiver so I reluctantly stood to pull on the hastily mended clothes. I lay down next to Jamie and let his warmth seep into me again. He wrapped the plaid around us securely and I fell asleep, finally able to rest.


	2. Chapter 2

“ _Take me home to Lallybroch,_ ” I told a now awake Jamie. I had made up my mind about which husband I belonged to. I loved Frank but Jamie felt like a part of me. I couldn't leave him and here I was.

I sank down to him as he reached up to me. Our mouths met and we kissed. It was like coming home

“Are you sure, lass?” he asked, breaking the kiss. He held open the blankets he had been wrapped in.

“I'm sure,” I said as I took my rightful place next to him. He tucked his plaid around me and rested his arm on my waist.

“Good, because I canna do that again,” Jamie said against my ear. “I canna stand by and watch you go without me. So you're stuck with me now.”

“Which is right where I belong,” I said as I turned and reached for him. Our lips touched and our hands busied themselves with the work of divesting each other of our clothes. We joined passionately and explosively. 

Sometime later, I woke out of the contented doze I had fallen into and stared at the dying fire. I reached a hand out of the warm nest I was laying in and put another log on the fire. Sure, my own time had hot water and radiators that kept one warm, but this time had a tall Scott who was his own radiator and once the fire was built back up, I was as warm as I had ever been.

“Tell me about your time, Sassenach,” Jamie asked as he sat up behind me. “You once wanted to tell me about where you came from and I stopped you. Will you tell me now?”

“I said that in anger and frustration,” I said.

“Is it so different,” he continued. “Your time?”

“It is,” I said as I dragged my shift back on. If we were going to sit and talk, then a few more clothes wouldn't come amiss. “For one thing, women can be doctors, lawyers, shop keepers, and many other professions.”

“Don't their men folk take care of them?” he asked puzzled.

“It's not a matter of being taken care of,” I said. “It is a matter of doing what one has a talent for. I told you the whole world had just been at war, right?”

“Aye, though how that came to be I canna see,” Jamie said.

“Well it was the second time in less than forty years,” I explained. “Many of the men who used to do those jobs went off to war and never came back. Women also have the right to vote for the members of the House of Commons. Where I come from women and their opinions are equal to men's and are listened to. We are no longer viewed as property of our husbands. In fact any property we have before marriage remains our own. If Frank had ever beat me the way you did, I could have sued him for divorce and be granted it. Not only that, if I had given evidence in a criminal trail he'd be convicted of spousal abuse and jailed.”

Jamie sat up and pulled on his shirt. He sat next to me, staring into the fire. After a moment he picked up the plaid and wrapped it around himself and stood up to pace.

“So that's why you fought me and called me names,” Jamie said after a moment. “Not only was I beating you for trying to get back to your own time. Something that if I had known what was going on, I wouldn't have punished you for, but it wasn't the way it was done in your time. “

“Yes,” I said. “You couldn't have known.”

“That doesn't excuse me committing crimes against my wife,” he said as he paced back to me. “Crimes against a woman I swore to protect.”

“You didn't know,” I said again. I had been mad and hurt at the time. I knew that it was the way things were done here, but the shock had hurt more than the spanking had. I hated that my revelations continued to cause him pain but there was a small part of me, a part I was mostly ashamed of, was glad that the guilt was tearing him up. It was just revenge after all. I pushed that thought away and got to my feet.

“Come back to bed,” I said as I walked over to him and put my hand on his shoulder.

“How can ye want to lie next to me let alone bed me after what I did to ye?” he asked as he looked me in the eye. I could see the fire light reflected in the sad blue eyes.

“I forgave you a couple days later,” I said. 

“Then why was it a week before I was aloud back in your bed?' Jamie asked.

“Because I was hurt and stubborn,” I said. I put my other hand on his other shoulder and leaned up to kiss him.

He kissed me back and wrapped his arms around me. He lifted me from the ground and carried me back to our blankets by the campfire where he laid me gently down. He slid his lips from mine to trail kisses down my neck.

“Mo duinne,” he sighed into my ear.

He made love to me then. Slowly and tenderly, eager to show me he was capable of that as well as the rough and fast we had indulged in an hour past. He whispered his love for me.

We fell asleep afterward, tangled together like we were meant to be. I slept more peacefully than I had in months. My mind was finally at peace. I had chosen to be where I was and I was in the arms of my love. Jamie held me close in his sleep, as if he was afraid that I would slip away in the night and he meant to prevent it.

The next morning we struck camp and mounted Donas. We rode in silence for a while, each of us lost in our own thoughts. I wasn't regretting my choice yesterday, but I couldn't stop thinking of Frank and how I had left him with no notion of what had happened to me. I wished I could let him know I was alright and for him to go on with his life. But if I could do that than the guilt I had managed to squash would hit me full force.

“Tell me about your husband,” Jamie said as if he could read my thoughts from behind me. “Frank, I think you said his name was.”

“Yes, Frank,” I said. “He's a history professor and had just accepted a position to teach at Oxford University. We were staying in Inverness as a last holiday before he took up the position. It was a sort of second honeymoon as we had been reunited, after six years apart due to the war, for about six months.”

“Six years?” Jamie said. “That is a long time. I presume he was away fighting?”

“No actually, he had a position in the war office in London overseeing intelligence officers,” I said. “I was on the front lines as a nurse. I saw to the injured in battles across France and Italy. Many we horrific. The technology of war develop a lot in the next two centuries and it is possible to bomb an entire town from the sky.”

I looked over my shoulder at him.

“You accused me of not taking this time seriously because I didn't believe it was deadly,” I said. “It was actually the opposite. After the mass weapons and the battle aftermaths I had seen, killing one on one so close you could see your opponent’s eyes, it didn't seem like war but murder and murder seemed more preventable somehow.”

“I said a lot of things that night,” Jamie replied. “Most of them not relevant in the light of recent revelations.”

“No, they were relevant,” I assured. “Just not in the way you meant. I did need to take this time more seriously. There is such a thing as justice and to the men what you did to me was justice. I'm not saying that I'll let you do it to me again, because I'm standing by that promise to cut your heart out and eat it for breakfast if you ever beat me again, but in that instance it was the right thing to do.”

“Do not worry,” Jamie said. “I stand by my vows. Both the one to love, honor, and cherish you and the one to not lift a hand against ye.”

“Good,” I said. We lapsed back into silence for a while.

“You said that in your time, bombs can be dropped from the sky?” Jamie asked puzzled.

“Yes, from airplanes,” I said.

“Airplanes?” He asked.

I explained the airplane to him and felt his wonder. I had no idea how smart it might be to explain the future to him – if it might mess up the timeline but I had already shared the personal history, might as well explain some of the coming marvels too.


End file.
